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See Snit's reply to this.
From: hippyman Date: Mon, 27 Mar 2000 13:50:57 -0800 _Wild College Girl Recipe_ Wild College Girls are extremely tasty and sweet. The species of College Girls I prefer are; slim, large-breasted, and preferably red-headed, though any color of fur is sufficing to the palette. You can find the College Girl in it's natural habitat - nearby campus bars. While tracking the game, I suggest that great care is taken in using proper hunting calls. The wrong call, such as "hey babe, where you been all my life?" will usually scare the game away rather quickly. Calls that include light banter mixed with humor often works on most game. The fresher (as in younger) the game, the easier the catch. The elder of the species are usually harder to catch, as they've been seasoned through a few years of hunting already. They can be a delicacy also, though, as they sometimes provide learned and well practiced flavors if captured. Ingredients: 1 College Girl 2 mangos 2 papayas 1 lime 1 bottle of champagne 1 six pack of Guinness Directions: Step 1: Drink a few bottles of your Guinness, as it loosens your tongue making for more effective hunting calls. Step 2: Proceed to Wild College Girl habitat. Hunt. Step 3: After locating the College Girl of your choice, transport the game to a location; your place, her place, or hotel if you have pet game at home[1]. Place game on couch. Fill a glass with champagne and offer it to game. Explain that you'll return shortly with a treat, then proceed to Step 4. Step 4: Enter kitchen area, prepare and slice mangos and papayas. Place into bowls. Slice lime and squeeze juice of lime over fruit. Sip remaining Guinness at this time if desired. Step 5: Return to game and offer fruit[2]. Refill game's glass with champagne[3]. Step 6: Ok, this is where the preparation gets important - After you wine and dine the prey, you must baste it with wit, humor, and forms of seduction to coax it into removing it's outer layer of protective skin (clothes). This can be a difficult task to accomplish, depending on the nature of your catch. Usually, this form of game is more than willing to oblige though. Once this step is achieved, move onto Step 7. Step 7: Place game upon bed, or if preferred; table, chair, floor, washing machine, etc... At this point, you may indulge in the sweet taste, perfumed odor, and beauty of the Wild College Girl. Enjoy! NOTE: Use of condom while dining is highly suggested. Some game may be tainted, resulting in transfer of disease. -hippyman [1] The capture and transportation of game must be done with the permission of your prey, or State Game and Wild Life (the law) will place an extremely heavy penalty upon you. [2] I've often found that Wild College Girls love being waited upon, wined, and dined with tropical treats. Rumor has it that mangos are an aphrodisiac, also. [3] You may refill the game's glass with more wine if needed, however I suggest only offering the prey up to 3 glasses maximum. Any more than that and the game might become unruly and sloppy. Excessive amounts of wine given to game might also break State Game and Wild Life laws, and once again, penalties will be placed upon you.
From: Matt Cramer Date: Mon, 27 Mar 2000 16:10:40 -0500 (EST) On Mon, 27 Mar 2000, hippyman wrote: > The fresher (as in younger) the game, the easier the catch. But be very careful, game below legal maturity should not even be considered. Check your local laws. Never cross state lines and even glance at prey under 18 years, as Federal hunting laws apply. When in doubt, ask for a valid photo ID. "The game looked of maturity" is never sufficient for an irate game warden who catches you hunting immature game Avoid hunting for illegal yet apparently very mature game in areas known as "Malls", even when the normal hunting areas have thin herds. These areas are notorious for concentrating immautre game. > The elder of > the species are usually harder to catch, as they've been seasoned through a > few years of hunting already. They can be a delicacy also, though, as they > sometimes provide learned and well practiced flavors if captured. Usually the species will travel in herds. A keen hunter will observe the herds before beginning to stalk his prey; a successful hunt depends on devoting your energies towards a herd willing to let the hunter get close enough to make his move! > Step 6: Ok, this is where the preparation gets important - After you wine > and dine the prey, you must baste it with wit, humor, and forms of > seduction Many hunters get here only to fail. Prey is rarely interested in your new SDSL line and how much better you can play 3-D shooting games, your assault rifle collection, your Doctor Who video tape collection, etc. These things only frighten the game and send her scurrying back to her natural habitat. Hunters who trap game with pseudo-intellectual or pseudo-artistic conversation tend to do well. Matt --